Aphantasia is the suggested name for a condition where one does not possess a functioning mind's eye and cannot voluntarily visualize imagery.
i was chatting to someone about this, and wondered if there's a crossover with liking film (a lot)
. . . i don't know too much more about aphantasia. i definitely have it (the inability to create imagery in my mind at will). it feels like a kind of blindness. like, i ask myself what my dreams look like? what do they look like?
. . . so while i can be merry in my life, it can be jarring for a friend to talk about their love for a novel, or the vividness of their dreamscapes, or the life they imagine for themselves in 10 years' time. I say 'jarring', but there can be a spectrum of emotions wrapped up in that—from guilt, or envy, to fascination and wonder—all felt in a weird instant.
there's also memories. a lot the stuff i've mentioned, it's sort of like 'can't miss what i've never had', but memories seem like a big part of the texture of a person, of how they see themselves, relate and contextualise themselves and their life. and i'm terrible at them.
i think my favourite forms of art, are those that fill that space in memory. that make me see things i can't conjure myself.
Or, at least they'll allow me to disassociate, and give me peace from the addictive now.
do you have Aphantasia?